Saturday, May 06, 2006
Pan's Labyrinth Scares Me Silly
But goddamn does it excite!
With the Cannes Film Festival coming later this month, we should start hearing more details regarding Pan's Labyrinth, Guillermo del Toro's forthcoming Spanish language horror/fantasy/drama. Till then, get a load of these pics!
Source: KINO-EXPRESS Continue reading Pan's Labyrinth Scares Me Silly
Friday, May 05, 2006
Man, If I Could, I Would Totally Enter Jennifer Garner's "Kingdom"
The wickedly cute and now Alias-less Jennifer Garner is apparently in talks with Universal to star opposite Jamie Foxx and Chris Cooper in Peter "The Rundown, Friday Night Lights" Berg's upcoming The Kingdom.
The film reportedly "revolves around an FBI counterterrorist team on assignment in a Middle Eastern country investigating a terrorist bombing in one of the compounds housing Western workers."It's good to see Berg, who's shown to be a very capable director, not shy away from heavier, potentially more controversial material. Heavier and potentially more controversial than say, Christopher Walken, high school football, or killing pornstars anyway.
The Kingdom is currently set to start lensing sometime next month.
Source: Reuters Continue reading Man, If I Could, I Would Totally Enter Jennifer Garner's "Kingdom"
Snake On A Screen
The long-running and fun "tactical espionage" video game series Metal Gear Solid, which featured storylines that made little to no logical sense, cutscenes that gave new meaning to the words "indulgence" and "melodrama", and a Plissken-esque main character voiced by geek-scribe David Hayter, is now officially making its way to the silver screen.
The skinny from Kotaku: "In a recent broadcast of Hide-chan Radio, [Hideo] Kojima announced that MGS was indeed getting made into a feature film. 'We’re going to do it as a movie,' he confirmed. 'A Hollywood movie.' When? The director was reluctant to give specifics, saying 'I can’t say when yet.' He added that the film was going to be in English."MGS is distinctively a very Japanese game. The only real American thing about it is the use of recognizable military archetypes on the surface, but the game itself (and I'm talking the cinematics of the game, not the gameplay, which I assume would have little to do with the actual moviegoing experience) is completely Eastern in its ideas of drama. How's that going to work when it's turned into a Hollywood picture? Tom Clancy's Splinter Cell? Oh wait, that's already being made into a movie too!
Source: Kotaku Continue reading Snake On A Screen
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Editorial: DVD - What's Left? Part 1
It's hard to believe DVD has been around as a format for just under ten years. Of course, back then it was just emerging as the next-gen successor to Laserdisc, and it took a while for those shiny discs to win the hearts and minds of the most fickle people: the general public. But unlike LD, they managed to do it and even managed to condemn VHS to death, something which was unheard of in the late 90s. But with DVD approaching its tenth birthday, is there anywhere left to go?As you might have read, the HD-DVD/Blu-Ray bandwagon is starting, with HD titles already having been released in stores. Of course, asking the general public to buy movies again on a new format is not going to go well, so it remains to be seen how the next-gen evolution goes, especially since it's still in the middle of a format war. But while DVD has been prevalent, we've had all sorts of movies and programming that we almost never imagined we'd see. Special edition director's cuts that had once only existed in legend were showing up regularly on DVD. Mythic deleted scenes, such as the Dallas cocoon scene from Alien, were showing up on discs not only in quality better than a eighth-generation VHS tape bought at a convention, but also with commentary from the director, the actors, the editor. Hell, we've even got "lost films," such as the reconstruction of Tod Browning's legendary London After Midnight.
And with yesterday's announcement that Lucasfilm would finally be releasing the original, unalterered theatrical editions of Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back, and Return of the Jedi to DVD later this year, the one big digital holy grail had been found. Which begs the question: what's next? What movies are out there that have yet to be unleashed? What new features are we begging to see? Well, we'll have a look at we think might be the last great films to hit the format, starting with our first instalment, featuring probably the biggest unavailable DVD that isn't set in a galaxy far, far away....
1. BLADE RUNNER
Before you throw things at the monitor, yes, there is a version of Ridley Scott's magnificent SF opus available on disc. Blade Runner: The Director's Cut, originally released seven years ago in a very no-frills edition. Hell, I've watched that thing as many times as I possibly can, but we want more. For starters we want the theatrical edition. While the Director's Cut is my favourite version, there's something about the theatrical edition - with its Chandler-esque narration - that I love. And I want it back.
I'm also going on something Ridley Scott himself said a couple of years back. The saga of Blade Runner on DVD has been connected with more rumour, hearsay and false starts than I Am Legend, but at the time, it looked like it was on its way, and Scott himself immediately intrigued us by saying that he would have the original edition, the workprint edition, the director's cut, and a new version - a brand new cut supervised by him that would be his real director's cut. Needless to say, this sent me into spasms, and I was very disappointed when it never arrived. The issues with Blade Runner have long been discussed - legend has it that financiers and owners of the theatrical edition Bud Yorkin and Jerry Perenchio disliked the film so much, they do not want to see it released again - whether that's true, who knows? But there is light at the end of the tunnel.
From a Warner Home Video press conference, as reported by TheDigitalBits in January:
"And finally, here's a bit of news that's going to get a lot of you excited (and I made a point to specifically ask about this title, believe me)... Ridley Scott's Blade Runner (1982) is currently on track for release as a multi-disc special edition in time for its 25th anniversary in 2007. The release is far from certain (as usual, there's a lot more that I can't post about this title yet - think of the old saying, "Loose lips sink ships"), but Warner says that work is proceeding, most of the key players are involved and things are "looking good" for release next year. We'll see."
Of course, that doesn't mean that it's 100% on its way, but it's encouraging. Maybe an announcement will come out of the blue at some point? I mean, let's face it, who really expected the Lucasfilm announcement yesterday?
What We'd Like: Commentaries! Ridley Scott, Rutger Hauer, Harrison Ford. A feature-length documentary (let's face it, this movie has enough material for one!), the On The Edge of Blade Runner documentary with Mark Kermode's smarmy face and voice edited out, deleted scenes, isolated score, the works. Honestly, I'd be happy just with a Scott commentary and a documentary, but the other stuff would be amazing as well. Let's hope one day Santa grants us that wish.
Source: The Digital Bits
Continue reading Editorial: DVD - What's Left? Part 1
On A TV Far, Far Away...
In more Star Wars-related news, SCIFI Wire managed to catch up with producer Rick McCallum to see how things are going down on Tatooine, and he had a couple of interesting things to say about the new Star Wars TV show.Apparently, they're currently interviewing writers (someone tell me how to apply!) for the show, and are looking for it to start in about eighteen months. Whether that's starting production or airing, I'm not sure. He also confirmed that it'll be set between Episodes III and IV, and that it won't feature anyone we know - bar one person.
"All-new characters. That missing 20-year period when Luke is growing up. ... Think bounty hunter. That's all I can tell you. There's nobody else that you'll know [in it]. At the moment. You know, it's still [in] really, really early stages."
Of course, anyone with half a brain and an interest in Mandalorian history knows that he means Boba Fett. The badass bounty hunter first introduced in the most reviled piece of film in the saga's history (Not Episode I, but the Star Wars Holiday Special) who is at that timeframe still growing up, will no doubt be the focus. Hopefully they'll have a better actor to play him. Either that or my dreams will be confirmed and we'll see Bossk and Dengar: The Original Odd Couple slamming onto our screens.
One can hope.
Source: SCIFI Wire Continue reading On A TV Far, Far Away...
Summer Preview 2006 - Part 1
Mission: Impossible IIIThe Cast? Tom Cruise, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ving Rhames, lots of other people, Simon Pegg and Michelle Monaghan!
What's It About? A top secret organisation maintain their secrecy by blowing up large portions of freeways and foreign cities. Apparently this is the film to give Tom Cruise's 'Ethan Hunt' a real character and, as such, the action revolves around him trying to save unbelievably hot hubby Michelle Monaghan from Philip Seymour Hoffman's vengeful, slightly sweaty, fingers. Then things blow up. Good to see they aren't trying to give the film a real plot.
Will It Suck? By any reasonable expectations yes, this will suck hugely. No-one understood the first film, the second film killed John Woo and this third entry comes after half a decade of literally no-one asking for it. It had a revolving door of directors and actors and had no real script when it started filming. But it is the first action blockbuster of the year, Tom Cruise (presumably the only person who DID want the movie made) is a cyborg sent from the future to produce ruthlessly efficient blockbuster entertainment, J.J. Abrams (Alias, Lost) has made some great TV, Michelle Monaghan is incredibly hot and so is Simon 'Shaun of The Dead' Pegg.
We all know the mix of action, suspense and Tom Cruise's steely eyes we will get, and it turns up in our cinemas before we've grown bored of this year's summer film-glut so there's every chance that the film will actually be pretty good fun. The chances of you remembering it a week after are probably pretty low, however. One interesting thing, in these times where sexuality is so politicized, is that the bad guy is played by an actor who everyone thinks is gay, while the good guy is played by someone who is actually very short. Makes you think.
The Da Vinci CodeThe Cast? Tom Hanks, Ian McKellern, Audrey Tatou, more French people.
What's It About? An old man gets killed in the Louvre (place in France (in Europe (a magical place five hours in the future)) with paintings (paused movies)) and spends his last few minutes alive creating a code so elaborate only Forrest Gump can break it. In the book this code leads to hundreds of pages of weapons grade exposition broken up by suspense building chapter stops every dozen or so paragraphs.
Will It Suck? Oh, I hope so. "The Da Vinci Code" really is a terrible book for many, many reasons: It is a relentlessly patronising work designed to make dumb people think they are smart - the codes, mysteries and clues are slightly less complex than those found in the "Harry Potter" books, everything is split up into bite sized chunks for those only half reading the book while wondering what the in flight movie is, and, worst of all, the central mystery that provides the engine of the story is utterly broken - it turns out that all but one of the main characters already knows the secret, so completely deflating any sense of discovery that powers most 'thriller' films. The mystery unfolds not by Tom Hanks slowly finding the pieces of the puzzle, but by him deliberately witholding information he already knows from us, the audience. This makes the main, supposedly sympathetic, character a really smug bastard.
But the genius of Dan Brown is that he suceeded in making his dumb readers feel smart and, as a result, this is going to be the must-see movie of the summer. This is the movie that will get onto the main pages of newpapers, that your mum will know about and that everyone will have an opinion about. That it will be another solid but pedestrian outing from director Ron Howard in which absolutely no risks are taken is irrelevant.
If you want to avoid actually watching the film, here's a brief overview of the discussions you'll likely have:
A: "Dan Brown really did his research and you can't deny his facts. He's really on to something here. Look at the painting! LOOK AT THE PAINTING!"
B: "Dan Brown is obviously a communist trying to undermine the American way of life with his anti-religious propaganda, and possibly French."
C: "Audrey Tatou is hot."
Only one of these statements is correct.
Lady In The WaterThe Cast? Paul Giamatti, Bryce Dallas Howard, and probably M. Night himself as himself, or God, or a merman, depending on which you think is most disturbing.
What's It About? Paul Giamatti plays a loser schlub again who finds a water nymph in the swimming pool of the apartment complex he is looking after. Things happen very slowly while everyone talks in quiet, level voices and then a twist happens, involving Giamatti actually being dead or Bryce actually being Aquaman.
Will It Suck? See, I'm one of the few people who liked The Village. I think that Shyamalan has been progressively moving away from the 'twist' thriller he is famous for and towards a more mythical, fairy tale style of storytelling. At this point, if you are looking for the twist it will inevitably disappoint whereas if you watch his films as elegant, old fashioned dramas, they are very moving. Studies have proven that no-one is falling for that line, so I guess I shall have to take the piss a bit more. Highlights of this film will include Paul Giamatti in a wet t-shirt, a ten minute, one shot scene of Bryce making a cup of tea and some twat in the back row of the cinema wondering if Bryce's character is allergic to water.
What does the rest of the TFL crew have to say?
Shane Yaroch
Mission: Impossible III: I loved the first one, hated the second, and hold really no interest in the third. I love Hoffman and Monaghan, really like Cruise, and Abrams sounds promising, but M:I-2 soured me off of the idea of this as a franchise.
The Da Vinci Code: I've only read portions of the book, but credible people tell me it's no good. Dumb, lite, and bad, which sounds exactly like most Ron Howard movies (Apollo 13 aside).
Lady in the Water: God Andrew, you picked films that I'm not excited about at all. I'm one of those Shamalayan detractors. I don't like any movie of his that I've seen, except maybe The Sixth Sense. I can't rag on Giamatti, and Ron Howard's daughter was amazing in Manderlay, but Shamalayan seems to go out of his way to bore and annoy me with his work.
Bill Nolen
Mission: Impossible III: M:I:3, the most stupid abbreviation for a movie yet. What are the ":" for? Is there a time factor involved? Does a major plot point occur at 1,001 o'clock and three seconds? I don't remember if I saw all of part deux, but there's no way I'm supporting this movie, or the TomKat agenda.
The Da Vinci Code: Tom Hanks, how could you get wrapped up in this bullshit? I trust you to make decent movies. Now you go and connect your name forever more with this pseudo-religion clap-trap. And I still think Rita Wilson is too good for you. I will not read the book and I will not see the movie.
Lady in the Water: I hope the twist isn't that some lady is in the water. Can Shlamonham return to the semi-greatness of Unbreakable, or will this solidify his position as a dreamer hack? I hope it's good, actually. But I still won't see it at the theater.
Katanga
Mission: Impossible III: I loved the 1st one, the 2nd could legally be defined as "spermacide" and pretty much tarnished the rep of one the greatest action directors ever. I hope Abrams can nimbly sidestep the Cruise vortex.
The Da Vinci Code: I'm sure your grandmother will love it.
Lady in the Water: I'm 2 for 4 on the works of M. Night. If I see this it will be due to the assuredly strong performances of the two leads. If I were a lesser man, I'd make a lifeguard joke [here].
Charlie Brigden
Mission: Impossible III: The buzz is interesting, but I still find Cruise leaves much to be desired in his action hero mode. Aside from Alias, I haven't seen much of Abrams' work, but he and the cast are definitely intriguing. I can't help but wish they would have given Billy Crudup the lead though.
The Da Vinci Code: Audrey Tatuou is stunningly hot, and Tom Hanks has a mullet worthy of Winger. I'm new to the whole thing, having not read the book and knowing only what my fiancee has told me, so I'll see it to see what all the fuss is about. But I do so hoping that Hanks will close the movie with an acapella version of "Breaking The Law."
Lady in the Water: I haven't seen a MNS movie I've really liked, so it'll take a lot to get me in the theater for this. A lesbian scene between Bryce Dallas-Howard and Daryl Hannah's Madison from Splash would send it in the right direction, but I'm sure even that would be spoiled by a cameo by the director as the strap-on.
Carlton Stevens
Mission: Impossible III: I'm one who was alright with the first one and was never sure why everyone acts like the second one was a crime against humanity, since Woo's films were never exactly full of depth and intrigue. I have no interest in the third one other than seeing things explode and Michelle Monaghan's ass, so I imagine I'll be entertained.
The Da Vinci Code: Akiva Goldsman. Tom Hank's hair. McKellan needs to pay his bills. OMGZ THE PAINTNGS IS A SECRETZ!!11!!1 I think I've covered everything with this.
Lady in the Water: I liked Unbreakable, but that was mostly because of Sam Jackson and the soundtrack. Shyamalanhana (stole your joke, Bill!) seems to have brought nothing new to the table other than not-so-fond memories of the aforementioned Splash and whatever his "I wish I was Hitchcock" cameo might be.
George Merchan
Mission: Impossible III: See, I heart Cruise. The guy is intensity personified and I think that does a hell of a lot to make him a viable action hero. There's a physicality there that few real movie stars have. That element tends to be found more in the realm of lesser knowns or character actors. But I will say that if it weren't for the recent positive buzz, I wouldn't give a flying fuck about this film. This is still one of the most boring franchises to have been borne out of the Hollywood system (and that's considering I really enjoyed Brian de Palma's work on the first one). Hopefully this last (?) installment will provide something solid, both in terms of action and performances. Also, Maggie Q is hot.
The Da Vinci Code: First of all, it should've been called The Da Vinci Chode. 'Cause, you know, that would've been a hilarious play on words. OMG FUNEE! Anyway, Ian McKellan is in it, so automatically it gets points from me. The fact that he probably won't scream out "You... shall not... PASS!" at any point in the film subtracts a few, though. I'm sure this'll be a very safe and possibly very dumb film considering the pedigree of Brain Grazer, Ron Howard, and Akiva Horriblewriterman.
Lady in the Water: Giamatti aside, this shit looks G-A-Y. Then again, I did like Signs... Continue reading Summer Preview 2006 - Part 1
Move Over Bin Laden
There's a new terror in the sky.
I wish they would've lost ALL the text on this just released teaser poster from New Line. Let the visuals do the talking. And what do those visuals say? Everyone now, in unison...
Source: New Line Cinema Continue reading Move Over Bin Laden
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
BREAKING NEWS: OT DVD OK? - Update #2!
Update #2: CONFIRMED BY LUCASFILM!
In the latest twist, this has been confirmed by Lucasfilm. Click here for a look at StarWars.com's press release. This is no joke folks, it's happening. All I can really say is: FUCK YES.
__________
Update #1: The thread on the CHFB is now gone. Deleted by Colton? Who knows. However, I still have the page up, so I'll post what he posted and you can draw your own conclusions.
Post#1
We're reporting in USA TODAY Thursday that Lucas is releasing the three ORIGINAL Star Wars films -- without the digital tweaks and effects -- on DVD after all. And, once again, Han Solo will be shown shooting first.
I had a bit of this wrong in the original posting, so lemme try again:
-- As we all know, in the original STAR WARS, Han Solo pulls his gun and shoots Greedo in the Cantina scene.
-- When the film was restored and digitally tweaked for a new theatrical run, Lucas added a moment where Greedo fires first, misses, and then Solo shoots Greedo. As if it was self-defense.
-- Fans objected, and when the film hit DVD in 2004, Lucas tweaked it yet AGAIN, and this time Solo and Greedo shot simultaneously.
-- In the upcoming DVD (due in September), the original scene is back. Greedo warns about Jabba, Solo tries to wave him off and then pulls his gun and shoots Greedo dead.
By the way, the story says the transfer of the 'original' version will not be as pristine and scrubbed as the restored DVDs. In fact, at one point there was talk the originals no longer existed.
Anyhow, once we publish (in USA TODAY), tomorrow, I'll post the entire story.
Post #2
As I understand it, all the subtle and not-so-subtle additional effects will be gone...no extra creatures in the city, no ring around the Death Star as it explodes, no new Anankin at the end of Jedi...and all three films are being re-released in two-DVD sets.
__________
Just a quick update folks, with a rumour that has just hit the internet and is going to be all over the place by tomorrow, if it isn't already. David Colton, page one editor of USA Today, has let slip on the Classic Horror Film Board that George Lucas will finally be releasing the ORIGINAL versions of the Star Wars trilogy on DVD.
That means no Greedo shooting first, no distracting CG, no Hayden at the end of Return of the Jedi. USA Today will apparently be printing the full story tomorrow, and while this is great possible news, let's wait until it's confirmed before going gaga.
But holy fuck, don't let this be another hoax.
Source: The Classic Horror Film Board, StarWars.com Continue reading BREAKING NEWS: OT DVD OK? - Update #2!
Will Is Legend?
The saga of the film adaptation of famed SF writer Richard Matheson's classic novel I Am Legend has been going on for literally decades. Everyone from Ridley Scott to Paul Verhoeven to Michael Bay have apparently tried to develop the project with no luck - until now. It's been confirmed previously that Constantine director Francis Lawrence is helming the flick, but now, supposedly a star is attached. And it's none other than the Fresh Prince of Bel Air.Yes, that's correct, Will Smith. If you've followed the previous incarnations, or read books such as Tales From Development Hell, you might note that Smith had apparently been considered prior to this version, back when Michael Bay was reported to be making it. What's our view on this? I'm not sure, to be honest. Ali showed Smith can be a good actor with the right director and material, but other than that and Six Degrees of Separation, there's not really a lot more to go on other than his comedies and chick flicks, which seem to be the same performance over and over, really. Not ruling him out by a long way, but he's not the first actor that comes to mind.
Personally, while Lawrence garnered good reviews for Constantine (I never saw it), I think the project should go back to Ridley Scott. Scott should then go back and make up with Harrison Ford (the two aren't really on good terms after Ford's experiences making Blade Runner) and get him to do it. It would be a perfect way for Ridley to come back to SF, and a great comeback vehicle for Ford. Imagine that voice doing the world-weary Deckard-style narration throughout the movie. Oh well, I can hope.
Source: Ananova Continue reading Will Is Legend?
DVD Commentary: Wolf Creek
By Katanga, Bill Nolen, Charlie Brigden, and George Merchan
This is a little experiment that we wanted to try out, and if I do say so myself, it turned out pretty well. Essentially, it's a DVD review in the form of a running commentary. We've singled out everyone by naming them and colour-coding, so it's easy to read. We just hope you find it fun. Enjoy!
Session Start: Wed Apr 19 16:24:50 2006
Katanga: Ok...
Bill: I'm in.
Charlie: Woah, pick a room.
George: SO MANY WINDOWS!!!
Katanga: I have only one.
Bill: Blow me where the pampers is?
Charlie: I have fourteen. That's only 'cause I was doing research and googled "Scarlett Johansson's Creek".
After about 10 minutes of figuring out Windows and the internets in general...
Bill: I'm at the Dimension Films logo... I don't know about you fellas.
George: I'm paused at the Dimension logo.
Charlie: I'm on the menu.
Katanga: I'm inserting the DVD...
Later that afternoon...
Charlie: Mine doesn't have a Dimension logo.
Bill: Shite.
Charlie: It has like ninety-five other company logos.
George: This should all go in the final review.
Charlie: "Starring William Shatner" Oh shit, wrong flick.
George: Hahaha.
Charlie: The Darclight logo just went.
Bill: I want to make a movie called Darcwingducklight.
Charlie: I'm on "a Greg McLean film".
Katanga: Kill me... please kill me.
Later that evening...
Charlie: This movie sucks. All it is is some guy's name on a black screen.
Bill: OMG, weird trees.
Charlie: Wow, it's the opening sequence to Point Break.
Bill: It's already better.
Katanga: NICE TRANSFER.
George: That's another thing... the cinematography in this bitch is NICE.
Charlie: Pan right and you'll see a Dingo playing "Duelin' Banjos" on a ukelele.
Katanga: The socio-political subtext is already apparent with Charlie over here.
Bill: Never trust an Australian mechanic or a Russian gynecologist.
Charlie: Dig the shot of the fan belt.
Charlie: Reminds me of those great montages in Kong of the Venture's engines.
Katanga: This Aussie dude deserves to die if he doesn't get a threesome out of this.
George: Nice tits... one on the left.
Bill: They're just friends.
Charlie: That girl in the LA hat is a terrible actress.
Bill: Is she a soap star?
George: She's a poor, poor man's Keira.
Charlie: A very poor man's Kiera.
Bill: And more stork-like.
Bill: Have you seen the other one in anything, Charlie?
Charlie: No, not as far as I know.
Katanga: She's drinking a malt beverage.
Charlie: Ooh, dance music. That's the subtext connotation for "fun".
George: How's the audio on this? I'm watching from my PC, so no 5.1 for me.
George: The stereo is good anyway.
Bill: I'm watching on a mini-player.
Katanga: Likewise.
Charlie: It's not bad, despite the fucking awful music.
Bill: It was good yesterday on the home system.
George: Cool.
Charlie: Am I the only one watching sight-unseen?
George: I think so.
Bill: I haven't finished it yet.
Katanga: Ew... that chick's legs!
Bill: Mmm... THAT chick's legs.
George: It's already different from the cut I saw last year. Much tighter.
Charlie: Get ready to see a 200 foot shark.
Bill: Oh shit, I'm watching the unrated cut. Others?
Katanga: Me too.
Charlie: I'm watching the UK version.
George: Theatrical.
Bill: George, how could you?
George: But it's different from the press cut I saw last year. Again, much tighter.
Katanga: The direction is very tight, so far. Real clean.
George: Very.
Bill: It reminds me of the opening of Open Water.
Bill: But with a more hopeful future.
Katanga: Filmmakers on a budget should see this.
Charlie: I dig it thus far, although it's dangerously close to looking like a commercial for Kotex.
Katanga: This is DV.
Bill: Yeah, DV.
Bill: You can tell in the closeups.
George: It's gorgeous for DV, though.
Charlie: I wonder what it was shot on, camera-wise.
Katanga: Neat POV through the sign.
Bill: Great landscape shot before the title.
Bill: Looming dread.
Katanga: I can tell what nerds don't like about this already.
Katanga: This is the kind of thing nerds don't do... so HATE HATE HATE.
Charlie: I always kind of disliked the traveling lifestyle, because it was so many kids growing up who's parents paid for everything.
Bill: Blair Witch. Somebody was going to mention it.
George: Yup.
Katanga: Australia looks A LOT like Texas.
Bill: It reminds me of Nevada.
Charlie: I'm guessing the big windmill tower is a Texas Chainsaw reference.
Katanga: Cute kids, really.
Bill: Wonder if this is improv.
Katanga: I like these really normal, fun-loving kids... just chilling and being goofy.
George: It's these kinds of moments when they're just having fun, in a very natural way, that make the latter stuff all the more fucked up.
Katanga: Defintely... 'cause this is the sleight of hand of cinema.
George: I think the semi-documentary style adds lots to it, too.
Charlie: The docu style works.
Charlie: Although I think it's a tad played out in horror right now.
George: Which sucks since it lends itself well to the genre, I think.
Charlie: Exactly.
Katanga: Nothing's played out if it's done right.
Charlie: It works for the most, but I didn't like some of the editing and shooting at the caravan park.
Katanga: Mangy dogs are always harbingers of EEEEVILLLLL.
Bill: Where's the hobo guy on the bicycle?
Charlie: Birds flying away... it's The Day After Tomorrow effect.
Charlie: Oh jeez, don't take the dirt road.
Katanga: There should have been a scarecrow at the turn... or an old woman in a rocker.
Bill: A little boy making the throat cut gesture.
Charlie: Man in tire.
George: This guy's reminding me of Adama now.
Charlie: But... he's not Mexican.
George: The son!
Bill: Nice rack.
George: Nice rack indeed.
Bill: Emu Creek gets eaten by Wolf Creek.
Katanga: Holy shit... that camcorder is huge! This movie sucks.
Bill: Fly sound in the bathroom is disturbing.
Charlie: Is that Bruce Spence?
George: Too good looking.
Katanga: "Ben" Awesome name.
Bill: Shitty impression of Shatner.
Bill: G'Day, Shrimp on the Barbie, Mate?
Charlie: Yeah, this movie loses points for the obvious Shatner mocking.
Katanga: He definitely gets the threesome.
Charlie: This girl has great tits, but she's a fucking terrible actress.
Katanga: She's ok.
Bill: Why would he go for the other one?
Charlie: Holy fuck, it's Chopper!
Katanga: GAH!
Katanga: Uncle Jesse?
Bill: Sick balls Chopper?
Bill: Oh, that one.
Charlie: Mark "Chopper" Read.
Katanga: Eric Bana flick.
Bill: "Oy, give ya a fiver for the tarts..."
Charlie: This is a true story, right?
George: Yeah.
Katanga: Kick some Aussie ass, Ben.
Charlie: Kind of looks like Alan Lee.
George: Hahaha!
Bill: With horse hormones.
Charlie: "I'd kick your fucking arse if I weren't doing a 12-ft mural of Lothlorien, Sonny Jim!"
Katanga: HAHAHA!
George: HAHAHA!
Bill: Nice.
Charlie: I think this is based on Joanne Lees.
Charlie: She was an English chick who went backpacking in Oz with her boyfriend, and he got murdered by some loon.
Charlie: And she was tied up and shit.
Katanga: I read about that.
Katanga: A drug smuggler.
Katanga: I really credit horror films for never wanting to drive to the middle of fucking nowhere.
Bill: I had this feeling when i visited Area 51.
Katanga: Oh no, the brunette is vomiting blood!
Charlie: OMG foreboding skull.
Katanga: Bananas... very subtle, Mr. McLean.
Bill: Poo.
Katanga: Be funny if the skull turned to the camera and winked.
George: That's a great helicopter shot.
Charlie: Three drips of sap... foreboding!
Bill: Three saps in the desert, more like it.
Katanga: That's a big ass crater. In case anyone needs that pointed out.
Charlie: If there's a creature in a block of ice inside, run.
Bill: Seriously.
Katanga: Any guy that wouldn't accompany two nigh-fuckable girls to the desert doesn't deserve his own gonadia. Just sayin'.
George: Truth.
Katanga: This is realism.
Bill: If there's a king bed in the middle of that crater, yes.
Charlie: And there's kissing.
Katanga: Good, real kissing.
Charlie: True, although I think cutting to the close shot was a mistake.
Bill: Yeah, that was awkward.
Katanga: Someone needs to tell Bruce Campbell that chick stole his chin.
Bill: He should watch the razor beek when he snogs, too.
Charlie: It'd be novel if the other chick gets jealous, then slaughters them.
Bill: That doesn't happen?!?
Katanga: What are the girls names?
George: Tits and Bones.
Bill: Liz and kristy, according to IMDB.
Katanga: Cheater.
Charlie: Liz and Kristie apparently.
Katanga: Two cheaters.
Katanga: This isn't "slow" at all, btw... flying by, actually.
George: Yeah, it's FAST... compared to what I saw anyway.
George: OMG FOREBODING SUNSET!
George: And now, John Jarratt.
Katanga: He's awesome.
Katanga: Charlie, if you don't like this guy... I'm Dhalsim punching you from here.
Bill: This is the best Australian actor in the world.
Bill: Including Mel Gibson.
Charlie: Including Eric Bana?
Bill: Why not?
Katanga: Paul Hogan?
Bill: Bryan Brown, even.
Charlie: Jarratt is like Eric Bana in thirty years.
Katanga: Apparently, Tarantino put this guy in Grind House.
Katanga: You know what I love about this guy... he's so charming.
George: Just about to write that.
Charlie: He's like an Uncle.
George: Avuncular.
Bill: He's a great guy. Even later. Sort of.
George: I think so.
Bill: His face is like a Wallace and Gromit character.
George: LOL
Charlie: You can see how he'd be fuckin' scary.
Charlie: Like Sid Haig.
Bill: Large guy.
Katanga: God, this is so fucked up and lowkey... being towed by a total stranger.
Bill: I've been there.
Katanga: In the dark... in unfamiliar land.
George: It's perfect set up.
Bill: They have no idea where they are going. Great set up.
Charlie: Yeah, but Australia's extra dodgy, 'cause it's made up of English convict descendants.
Katanga: I love to think about at what point the writer glommed onto to a story...
Bill: Sort of similar to House of 1,000 Corpses.
Katanga: This is clearly the bit where he went, "Oh SNAP... this would be awesome!"
George: Thoughts on the music?
Charlie: Ginger Snaps-esque music.
Katanga: It's minimal, moody... not intrusive but eerie... I like it.
George: Yeah, works well with the visuals.
Bill: Oh, the little beeps are coming from the IM.
George: Haha!
Katanga: HA!
Charlie: According to the true story, the backpackers stopped to help someone with car trouble.
Charlie: But the dude shot him.
Bill: Nice hat menagerie.
George: Again, this is really well shot.
Katanga: Very well shot... I'm jealous.
Charlie: Ditto.
Bill: Great focus.
Katanga: Absolutely NO FAT.
Charlie: That timefade shot was amazing.
Bill: The new indie film look is clean and mean.
Katanga: I like that... leave the waste to Michael Bay.
Katanga: Plus, it indicates to me that these fellas really thought about their shots.
Katanga: Film grain... fine.
Charlie: I like grain.
Bill: I love fireside scenes.
Katanga: Yessir.
George: Love this scene.
Katanga: And Jarratt's muttonchops... excellent.
Charlie: He reminds me so much of Bana.
Charlie: Or vice versa
Katanga: Me too, Charlie.
Katanga: Look how clear his eyes are... he's a fucking pro.
Bill: I haven't seen Bana's early stuff.
Bill: My first was Chopper.
Katanga: Buy Chopper, Bill.
Charlie: Fucking hell, Jarratt is good.
Charlie: Chopper pretty much was his first.
Bill: Chopper is brutal.
Katanga: Won't regret it.
Charlie: Chopper is like the best most unseen movie ever.
Charlie: Before that, he was a stand-up comedian.
Katanga: An SNL type performer. Sketch comedy.
George: "Never know where I might pop up."
George: Creepy.
Bill: Whoa. Watch the face.
Katanga: Crocodile Dundee... I love that.
Charlie: Uh oh, he doesn't like the Croc Dundee stuff.
Bill: It's all fucked now.
Katanga: Look at that face.
George: So good.
Bill: Like Grampa from TCM, in a way.
Charlie: This scene is pretty tense.
Katanga: "like tourists"
George: Shit, such an awesome scene.
George: False sense of security. I love it.
Katanga: I love the slow burn...
Charlie: That chick is a good actress.
Bill: One Aussie making a Croc Dundee joke to another should not cause controversy.
Katanga: IT CAUSES MURDEROUS RAGE!!!!!
Bill: Exactly.
Bill: Slo-mo swing of machete to temple.
Charlie: "That's not a knife. This, is a knife."
Katanga: God... I love this movie.
Charlie: "That's not a knife, that's a spoon."
Bill: That's not a knife... oh wait yes it is. My bad.
Katanga: WHACK.
Charlie: I love the hairs on her face, by her eyes.
George: And it begins.
Katanga: I was really being glib... this flick so works because the girls are so real.
Katanga: Ben, too.
Bill: What a fucked up way to wake up.
George: The tonal shift from the last scene to this one is just so fucking great.
Charlie: There's so much Chainsaw in this.
Bill: Why do I think of Willem Dafoe when I look at her?
Katanga: It's nightmare stuff.
Katanga: I think the difference... is how quiet this movie is.
Katanga: It's so subtle and affecting... where as Chainsaw is like BLLLLLAAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!
Katanga: Not better, mind you, just different approaches.
Charlie: That's the thing... Chainsaw doesn't particularly bother with characterisation.
Katanga: I'd say Franklin is well done... but yeah.. the kids are mostly ground chuck from the get-go.
Charlie: Yeah, Franklin's the only one with a real discernable personality.
George: The emphasis on realism here is part of what makes it really work.
George: And like I said, the docu style REALLY helps, too.
Katanga: I love the tact real horror movies are taking these days.
Katanga: So anti-Scream...
Katanga: Non-ironic...
George: Thank goodness.
Charlie: Exactly. Scream put a pretty damaging face on horror, for me.
Bill: Don't spoil Hostel for me, I see it tonight.
Katanga: Good for you, sir. Certainly one of my tops of the year so far.
Katanga: Oh Jesus...
Charlie: The colours are great here.
Katanga: I'm really terrified of being chased... no idea why.... but this shit really gets in my head.
Bill: Great location.
Bill: The hook, TCM homage.
Charlie: This whole deal is so TCM.
George: Great scream.
Bill: She looks at the girl when she screams, good scene design.
Katanga: Jarratt just is superb.
Charlie: It's like the scene with Marilyn Burns and Jim Siedow.
Charlie: And when Ed Neal is doing the mock crying
Katanga: That giggle.
Bill: Yep.
Katanga: God, I'd want to be shot.
Bill: I want a shot of tequila.
George: He's disturbing as fuck AND charming still. It's such a great little combo.
Katanga: "I always use a rubber with you cunts... I don't know where ya beeeeen!"
Bill: He's a killer, but he's conscious of STDs.
Katanga: Chilling.
George: He's fabfunk.
Katanga: She's too alive for fabfunk.
Bill: The one on the wall makes him fabfunky.
Charlie: That sting of music as well... so TCM.
Charlie: That line... "You know how I know you're not gonna tell anybody?'
Charlie: That's so fucking evil.
George: Totally. It's so fucked up.
Katanga: Ebert really hated this.
Bill: Ebert is kind of a pussy.
Katanga: You know this completely adheres to that old adage of doubting the filmmaker's sanity.
Charlie: I'd say so if we didn't hear shit like this on the news.
Bill: Aren't all filmmakers a little bit twisted? Ben? Charlie?
Katanga: The good ones get it out of their system on film.
George: On a subconscious level, for sure.
Bill: It takes a lot of work to make the gruesome stuff come through in a film.
Katanga: Cronenberg, who for years I thought wasn't acting Nightbreed, seems like a real sweetheart.
George: Exactly.
Bill: I wonder if Dario Argento is a nice guy.
Charlie: He is.
Katanga: Yeah... seems like it.
Bill: Or Lucio Fulci, in the past?
Charlie: It's like Giger... nicest guy in the world, but paints his nightmares.
Bill: It's good therapy.
Bill: That's why I started writing.
George: "Let's play." His face there. You can't help but not like the guy despite what he's doing.
Bill: That's the new angle in horror, identifying with the monsters.
Katanga: I wasn't joking about the socio-politcal subtext... given the history of England and Australia.
George: No doubt, K.
Katanga: Beating him with the rifle... good girl.
Bill: She should have gone for the head. At least she was going to shoot him again.
Charlie: Yeah, but it's the Wes Craven effect. How much can you be pushed before you're as savage as your attacker?
Bill: I love when they have to go back in....
George: TENSE.
Charlie: The sound on the gunshots is great.
Katanga: You know... the missing keys and failed ignition thing is such a staple it's almost a cheat to ignore it. Done well here.
Katanga: I wish I was watching this on the big screen with a crowd again... this flick worked on my audience. Like a motherfucker.
Katanga: How was your theatrical, George?
George: It was all press types, but the 5 or 6 guys I spoke to afterward DUG it.
Katanga: Seeing it with press is a different beast, usually.
Charlie: I wish I'd seen this in the theater.
Katanga: Pushin' the truck... FUCK YOU MCLEAN!
Bill: Why dump the vehicle? Keep driving.
Katanga: It died, right?
Charlie: Did it mention what happened to the dude?
Katanga: I was pontificating... dunno.
Bill: Just wait, Charlie.
Katanga: Ben is enjoying a Wimpy's burger and chips.
George: People bitched about this moment on CHUD.
Bill: It's so LOTR.
Bill: LOL
George: Chewers are idiots! This scene works to perfection.
Katanga: Fuck City, USA... another old gag done to perfection.
Bill: LOL
Charlie: "Why not go through the Mines of Moria?"
George: LOL
Bill: There he is.
Katanga: Notice the lack of typity-type...
George: Enthralling.
Bill: Riveting. Totally engrossing.
Bill: A must-see.
Charlie: Cars... again, TCM.
Charlie: Does it stir your emotions?
Katanga: "catch me..." That really gets me.
Katanga: Definitely.
Bill: She should hide her.
George: I like the music here.
Katanga: Anyone who wants these girls to die... is probably a sociopath.
George: Or Andrew Clarke.
Katanga: Same thing.
George: Touche.
Bill: Anyone who leaves the house deserves what they get!
Katanga: Hahaha.
Bill: Real doll on the wall there.
Katanga: Call 1-888-FABFUNK to order one of your own!
Bill: I like the fumbling for the ammo. Always raises the blood pressure.
Charlie: The thing is, people who usually complain about this kind of stuff haven't been in any kind of situations where they've been traumatized, and they take the "oh, it's dumb" route instead of actually thinking about what happens there.
Katanga: Hey, Heath Ledger! Nice of him to cameo.
Bill: There's some nice porn on the wall.
Katanga: Oh fuck... the body pit.
George: The camcorder stuff is good.
Bill: She should have said, "groovy".
Bill: